Coming sooon: Ron de Jeremy vs Pappy Van Winkle

Post by **Capn Jimbo** » Sun Mar 06, 2011 8:28 am

Yet another amazing smackdown by moi...

You know what's funny? Most of those who read this have heard of Ron de Jeremy, a celebrity porn-star "rum" that's "Coming sooon...". An unrated rum that hadn't even been produced yet, and had no tasting notes. But how many of you have heard of Pappy Van Winkle's 20 Year Family Reserve?

Not many.

A sad commentary where an unrated, unproduced, unreviewed fun rum is better known than the highest rated spirit in the history of BTI. BTI has reviewed many thousands of wines and spirits over many years. In all that time not one spirit has ever been rated higher than 98, and I'm including the best of the best of whiskys, rums, tequilas, vodkas et al, some costing up to $4000 per copy.

I'm serious.

That was - until a small family distillery in Frankfort, Kentucky started releasing very small quantities of very old bourbons (from 10 to 23 years). These were pretty much unnoticed until reviewers like Michael Jackson, Jim Murray and Dave Broom took note. A bottle was submitted to BTI and voila!

The highest rating for any spirit, ever - 99 out of 100. The Van Winkles started winning at all the important competitions and became the hardest "get" in the business.

This truly made worldwide news, and the small supplies of the Van Winkles disappeared. The "99" rated 20 year, listed at today's price of $99 started appearing on Ebay for up to $250. Retailers raised their prices and refused to sell more than one to customer - assuming they had any in the first place. The Van Winkles (10-12-13-17-20-23) are still released just once a year, with retailers being restricted to very, very limited quantities (no cases here).

Don't believe me? Try to find one now; you won't. Except for moi.

I got one, and had to pay a $40 premium for it, at $140. The hardest "get" was gotten. But how does this all related to big dicked Ron Jeremy's rum? It's even rarer, because not one has been released.

Au contraire.

I was just informed that based on The Rum Project's hilarious, first-and-only published non-review of this non-rum (watch the One-Eyed Spirits site for it), that we will be getting one of the first bottles produced for our real review.

How 'bout dat!

And continuing in The Rum Project's tradition of treading where no intelligent rum website dares to go - telling the truth about rums and spirits, calling a dick a dick - we break ground yet again when we will dare to compare the world's highest rated spirit against, yup, Ron de Jeremy. The two hardest "gets" in the business. Why us?

No one else has the balls. We will sooon have both of them...

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Note: The Rum Project is proud to announce the very first actual review of Ron de Jeremy (link here). Don't miss it!

Post by **Capn Jimbo** » Sun Mar 27, 2011 1:51 pm

Gird yer loins...

Fellow idiots, rejoice! I have been told by Olli of Ron de Jeremy that my numbered bottle is on the way. According to the tracking number, I'd say it'll be here by Wednesday.

Now for those of you who, recalling that I stated I'd never accept this freebie, now are calling me a hypocrite... you're absolutely right! But get it right - I'm a liar AND a hypocrite. But sensing yet another first - comparing rum's greatest embarassment with the highest rated spirit in the world - the two hardest "gets" in the business, why I'd have to be an idiot not to demonstrate the amazing flexibility and open field running for which I'm known.

They don't call me the Compleat Idiot fer nuthin. Stay tuned...

Post by **Capn Jimbo** » Wed Apr 13, 2011 12:13 pm

Finally! Pappy Van Winkle 20yo reviewed...

Without further ado - we review the highest rated spirit in the world (here). Read this review, or remain just another idiot. You decide...